Late Thoughts…

I cannot say that I was not warned by my predecessors of the so-called “fate” which awaited me should I choose to use my “gift” and chase my dream. Nightmares and sleepless nights, I’m told, are part of the gig. It’s a total commitment or not at all. And I have not yet learned how to control it. So, it also messes with the priorities I have in my life. It pushes and shoves until it’s “numero uno”, and then I have to remember to push it away and “punish” myself (or at least that’s what it feels like, though it’s not really) to get myself back on track. How frustrating! Is it worth it? I don’t know. I can’t decide. I don’t think I want to know my answer to the question. I’m afraid it will be the wrong one.

“While I’m wide awake, [you’ve] no trouble sleeping…They say bad things happen for a reason, but no wise words gonna stop the bleeding ’cause [you] moved on while I’m still grieving, and, when a heart breaks, no, it don’t break even…now I’m trying to make sense of what little remains…” – Breakeven lyrics by The Script

Wow. That’s a sad song, but I love the music. It’s so…catchy! I could live without the depression in the words, though. What is it with today’s music? Because “Breakeven” is not the only one of its kind. The style sounds…happy (for lack of a better word), while the words are so opposite.

Oh! And I’ve been thinking about some of the other lyrics: “I’m still alive, but I’m barely breathing, just prayin’ to a god that I don’t believe in.” (-Breakeven lyrics by The Script) I know there are people who are trying to take God out of the lives of others, but He will never be gone. Even those who don’t believe in Him pray to Him. And adults can try all they want to take prayer out of schools, but, as long as there are tests, there will always be students who silently mutter prayers that God will help them pass. It’s inevitable; even if one doesn’t pray at other times or for anything else, one will always turn to a higher power in times of need and when one’s own sheer will power ceases to have any effect on one’s circumstances. So why not turn to Him all the time? That is something I continue to struggle with understanding because I want Him in every part of my life…Haha, I just realized something. I guess I don’t need to be afraid of the answer to my previous question. That’s refreshing. 🙂

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~ by Lady Molly on March 31, 2010.

2 Responses to “Late Thoughts…”

  1. I should probably figure out how to change the time because it’s really only a few minutes after midnight. 😛

  2. Welcome to Thursday Poets Rally Week 24, here is what you do to participate:

    First, please read the questions and respond:

    http://thursdaypoetsrallypoetry.wordpress.com/agreement-between-jingle-and-thursday-poets-rally-participants/

    Then, Post an original poem in your own blog, and place your link in under the following post to participate:
    http://jingleyanqiu.wordpress.com/2010/06/30/thursday-poets-rally-week-24-july-1-7-2010/

    Now, visit and comment for a minimum 18 poets from week 24 participants list, after you are done, comment to let Jingle know, you are in perfect shape then…

    Awards are given by Jingle via notifications….

    Make sure that you: return favors to poets who have visited your blog
    Have visited 18 poets NEW to you.

    Thank You for the attention.
    Happy Monday!
    Happy Poetry Reading and writing!

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